Aunt Harriet is rehearsing for the Annual Wayne Foundation Benefit, at which she’ll be singing. She’s accompanied by Chandell, the famous pianist, and they’ll be playing some Scottish tunes. Their rehearsal is interrupted by three women in tartan miniskirts who talk with comedy Scottish accents and play bagpipes. They’re able to render Chandell and Alfred unconscious and stun Harriet enough so that they can steal her earrings. They then raid Wayne Manor.
Harriet calls the police. She’s distraught, and wonders what Bruce and Dick will think when they come back—turns out Bruce is out hunting with the Millionaire’s Club, and Dick is on a school holiday.
Gordon has the GCPD switchboard put him through to the Bat-phone. A nervous Alfred heads to the library to reluctantly tell Gordon that Batman is taking one of his infrequent vacations. Gordon and O’Hara are devastated, as this means they’ll actually have to do their jobs!!!!!!!!
Gordon and O’Hara question Chandell, and assure him that they will protect his concert at Gotham Town Hall.
However, Chandell is actually the criminal responsible for the robbery at Wayne Manor, as we see him meeting with the three women who robbed Wayne Manor, Doe, Rae, and Mimi. That he was a victim puts him above reproach. But it turns out that Chandell isn’t a criminal willingly—he’s being blackmailed by his cigar-chomping twin brother Harry. During a performance at the White House—the one that put Chandell on the map—the pianist used a music roll to “play” the piano while he mimed it, as he’d hurt a finger before the gig. Chandell has a plan to buy off Harry and get himself out of his yoke.
At Gotham Town Hall, it’s pretty much a police state, with machine guns, barbed wire, and fingerprinting at the door. Gordon won’t let anything happen to Chandell’s concert, even if he has do mow down innocent civilians to do it!
Out in the forest, Bruce is listening to the concert on the radio, and he detects a wrong note—which is extremely unlikely from the fingers of the great Chandell. He calls Dick, interrupting a date with a girl, and they agree to meet at Wayne Manor.
While the concert is going on, the Burma Import Company is robbed by Doe, Rae, and Mimi, this time dressed in bellydancing outfits. At the same time, Chandell is playing a Burmese number—the same pattern as the Wayne Manor robbery.
Bruce and Dick return home to get a report from Alfred. (Harriet stayed behind to visit with Chandell. Dick gets a bit worried about his aunt’s virtue, but Bruce assures him that Harriet is a woman of strong character. The levels on which this exchange, which includes a mention of Chandell’s reputation as a ladies man, is hilariously absurd are legion.)
Doe, Rae, and Mimi, still doing the bellydance thing, show up at Wayne Manor, on Chandell’s instructions, but disappear just as quickly. The Dynamic Duo call Gordon to assure him that they’re back, which relieves Gordon no end, and Gordon tells Chandell, who’s less happy about it. But he puts on a brave face as he shares a root beer with Harriet.
Once Harriet leaves, Chandell rolls his eyes and then goes to call Harry to give him the bad news that Batman and Robin are back in town. He has a plan, though, and tells Harry to wake up his piano movers.
Batman and Robin arrive at Town Hall just as Harriet is getting into a cab. Chandell hits himself over the head with the root beer bottle just before the Dynamic Duo enter. (How he knows that our heroes will be coming along just at this moment remains unclear.) They wake Chandell with smelling salts, at which point the pianist gives his brother up, sending the heroes to an abandoned player-piano factory.
They leave him behind with his cranial trauma untreated and head to the factory, where they find Doe, Rae, and Mimi still doing their bellydance thing. Batman thinks they’re the victims of criminal hypnotism, but before they can try to interrogate them, Harry’s piano movers show up and fisticuffs ensue. The fight ends when Harry drops a music roll on their heads.
Harry puts them on the conveyor belt to the paper cutting machine, and they’re fed into it, to be cut to pieces as the machine re-creates the music that Harry plays over the PA system.
HOLY SOUR NOTE!
THE DYNAMIC DUO PERFORATED INTO PIANO-ROLLS!!
HOW WILL THIS MUSIC END??
TUNE IN TOMORROW FOR THE DIRE, DREADFUL DIRGE
SAME BAT-TIME, SAME BAT-CHANNEL!!!
Behind the scenesEdit
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